The Gift List

While I was in Barnes and Noble Looking for a gift for my Valentine I came across a book that gave the "answers" to situations with women. As I skimmed through this book I thought, this would be a good low key gift for Valentine's day for a man... Until ... while I was skimming I realized this had to have been written by a man, because there is NO WAY any of those "answers" would have done anything other than create more situations leading to more questions.

Gentlemen I'm presenting you with the Gift List - rules and regulations...

Recently I have given the women the idea passed down to me from Zarah, to make an online album with all of their favorite things so that the men don't have to guess anymore... just click and go...
With this however there are certain things men need to know...

There is a place and time for every gift

We will Start with Christmas, mainly because this is an obvious day for gifts...
One of my close friends (now husband) asked if he could hide her gift at my house until Christmas, of course I said yes, and when he brought in this huge box with a Television on the front I thought it was a gag gift; You know those small gifts in big boxes... No, It was a TV.

MEN DO NOT, I REPEAT DO NOT EVER GIVE A TV AS A GIFT TO YOUR WIFE/GIRLFRIEND unless she has clearly stated that she wanted a tv, otherwise we know that this gift was not for us, we normally do NOT want a tv for ANY gift, most of us are pretty independent and capable of getting this on our own if we want it.
Chances are if she's a mother she doesn't have time to even sit down to watch a 30 minute sitcom.

Electronics are not the gift you want to give in general, unless its something we would use in our every day lives such as a laptop, mp3 player, Kindle/Nook, something that isn't going to waste our time, because if you haven't noticed we feel that our time is precious and not worth wasting.

On to Birthdays...
Now another gift that many men tend to get wrong is Kitchen and or home goods...
Men, if your wife or girlfriend is a baker or loves to cook, again there is a time and place for everything. Birthdays are personal... this is your woman's special day, a day that nobody else can take from her, so give accordingly.

DO NOT BUY HER ANYTHING THAT HAS TO DO WITH THE KITCHEN/LAUNDRY OR CLEANING.

Mother's day is the day you want to give these types of gifts.

Birthdays are about those special moments to remind her why she celebrates life. This is when you pay attention to her (online) album, or the hints she's given. If you are not up with technology and you can't see this album then pay attention, she will always put her thoughts out there, you just have to catch them.
Pay attention to what shes looking at in the stores, magazines, online... It's best that you take the time to pay extra attention to her as this day comes close, no not because it will put her in a good mood and work to your advantage (although this is true ) but because, she will be throwing out suggestions quicker than you reach the plate.


Do's:
- Music, Movies,Spa Days, massages, Something incorporating her favorite things.
- Dinner at her favorite restaurant or something has a special meaning to the 2 of you, a movie that you know she'd like (even if you don't- THIS IS NOT YOUR DAY)

If all else fails, ask a friend of hers, we always have the answer.

DONT'S:
-Perfume (girls can be sensitive- shocking I know) but she can take this gift in so many different ways that its not even worth chancing. Some girls are obsessed with fragrances so unless you know exactly which perfume she wears or likes... just steer clear of this.

-Clothes- If you don't know her size in clothes this will end badly... IT JUST WILL don't question it. If you know she likes clothes just go for the gift card... Impersonal yes but if you want to stay on the safe side this is the only time gift cards are alright.

-Dinner NO FAST FOOD OF ANY KIND, or Franchise unless you know this is something she prefers. It's not about the money you spend, but we are at fast food and chains every day, try to go out of the box.

The Longer you have been together you will be able to know which do's and don'ts are and are not acceptable.

And for the Main Event...

.............VALENTINES DAY............

This for some can be tricky... I myself am not a fan of flowers for the most part and am allergic to chocolate... so most would think that this day wouldn't be one of my favorites, but oh contraire ... It's actually my most favorite day of the year.

I'm a hopeless romantic, I begin and end with Love, I don't care what anyone says or how they want to discredit this day, yes we should show our loved ones how we feel about them every day, but for some men who are not always the most open about their feelings, this is the day where they get to pull out all the stops without feeling emasculated. We can all be real about this, this day is for the women... Most men who have good women in their lives will always see the same actions on a daily basis as they will on Valentines day, the only difference is you're going to get a gift that maybe you wouldn't necessarily get on any other day.

Valentine's day is the day for FLOWERS, BALLOONS, CANDY, LITTLE STUFFED ANIMALS..
You can always give flowers and balloons on birthdays but, this day is the day of all days that it's just a given... Personalize it a little bit, if she's not into flowers, don't get something traditional, star gazers, tulips, lilies, orchids (my favorite) or a flower in her favorite color. You do not always have to do roses, I personally can't stand roses, but something that "reflects her beauty" (you can use this line) is a good idea... and here's a little secret for most of us, it's not about where it came from either, if you sneak a flower from someones bush... (I won't tell)
Save the normal birthday, Christmas type gifts for then, on Valentines day keep it simple but filled with love, take her to dinner somewhere romantic, give her a personalized frame with a picture of the two of you from one of your favorite moments.
Remember this is a full day event, start with something in the morning, get up early and bring her breakfast in bed, take the flowers/ balloons to her office, and finish it off with dinner or whatever surprise you have decided to go with.

* This can double for anniversaries*

Again, the longer you have been with the person will elevate the experience of this, we love to know that you remember every detail of every moment we've shared ... now of course we know you will never remember as much as we do, but if you can remember one special moment and "bring it back to life" so to speak. We love nothing more than to know you hold that same moment just as special as we do.

We are creatures of habit and at times tend to forget that there are other things out there aside from the norm.. A helpful little hint I'd like to give is this... The more attention you give us, the more we're going to give you...

More than anything we're going to love whatever it is you give us, for the simple fact that you thought about us, but we all know, the better the gift the better the return...